Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Critics

Critic: Someone who goes along for deride

Criticism: Something you can avoid by being nothing, doing nothing, and saying nothing


Read a great little story about criticism…


A traveler nearing a great city asked an old man seated by the road, “What are the people like in this city?? The man replied, “What were they like where you came from?
“A terrible lot!” the traveler reported. “Mean, untrustworthy, detestable in all respects.
“Ah,” said the old person. “You will find them the same in the city ahead.

Scarcely had the first traveler gone on his way when another stopped to inquire about the people in the city before him. Again, the old person asked about the people in the place the traveler had just left. “They were fine people, honest, industrious, and generous to a fault. I was sorry to leave, declared the second traveler. Responded the wise one, “So you will find them in the city ahead”

Ever struggle with how to deal with criticism? I sometimes do. Some people just can’t seem to find a loving word to say and always seem offended by something or the other! However, we need to distinguish between helpful criticism and the unhelpful type. A few ideas that I’ve found helpful…


Know your critics – Not all criticism deserves the same level of attention. I pay the least attention to anonymous criticism. I don’t want to use up all my productive time responding to people I don’t know! I think someone who cares enough to sign their name deserves an answer. But when the criticism is from someone who you know cares about and is invested in what you’re doing, then you need to take time to think through and engage in what they’re saying.

Listen to your critics – it’s important to have some mature, trustworthy friends who know you well, that you can copy the most stinging criticism to. They’ll often be able to advise you on how accurate it is and whether you need to take time to respond to it.

Embrace your critics – as leaders, we all need to find a ‘red-flag mechanism’; people we know and trust and who are not impressed by our position. People who we can count on to tell it like it is, in love. People who are good at what they do and have some knowledge of what we do. These are the people whose criticism we want to invite regularly, even before they offer it!

Be a good critic – not everyone is open to criticism. Know which people will benefit from hearing your opinion, care enough about them and about the outcome, and always sandwich your suggestion with affirmation.


Proverbs 9:7-9. ‘Whoever corrects a mocker invites insult; whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse. Do not rebuke a mocker or he will hate you; rebuke a wise man and he will love you. Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still; teach a righteous man and he will add to his learning.’

2 comments:

Wams said...

Hi Pastor M,
This is a great forum to interact with you. Thanks for the opportunity.
It's great being in your congregation. Thanks big for the article on critisism....of late, i have been struggling to understand why my very close friend just never sees the positive side of things and just critisizes....just thinking, may be i have never been open minded about the same.

After reading this article, i seriously want to take every critism from him and look at it from the positive side of it. Be assured that i will apply the principles you've outlined.

You've been a blessing to me and my family.
Thanks for being a blessing to many.

Pst. M said...

Hey Wams, thanks for your comment. May God give you the humility to listen to your friendly critic but also the discernment to apply what is from God and discard the rest!